Quite Possibly My Least Favorite Day of the Year

Remember that old commercial with the father pushing the cart down the shopping aisles as he smiled and nearly danced, loading up his cart with lined paper, highlighters, glue sticks, and the like with “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” playing?

I’m all for office supplies. In fact, I pretty much love office supplies. Who doesn’t get a little giddy about pocket folders and binders? The smell of freshly sharpened pencils. Opening up a new box of crayons with all the tips in tact. Opening up all the packages and organizing them in plastic cases and sliding them into little pencil holder pockets in backpacks. Now, that’s a good time.

But, today, I wasn’t singing. Because we weren’t shopping for school supplies today. We were shopping for school shoes. And, I hate shopping for school shoes.

This is pretty much how it has always gone down – me with 3 or 4 (now) children who think the kids’ shoe store and their nifty train set up is their playground. It takes 15 minutes just to measure them all. I’m already sweating at this point. “Evan, find a pair you want to try on. No, Ashlyn, you need sneakers, everyday shoes, not pink glitter sparkle shoes. Yes, they’re pretty, but no. Drew, put the gummy dinosaur back, and please choose some shoes to try on.” Evan finds a pair he likes. They cost more than my bridesmaids dresses did. I coach him towards another pair. He doesn’t like them. They don’t have Ashlyn’s size. They have to order them. Drew can’t decide between 3 pairs. Every shoe is either too tight, too heavy, too stiff, too “I don’t know” for Evan. And, now, add in the complexity that Lydia’s teeny toes are so teeny that real shoes are not easy to find. I call Mark to have him look at shoes online and try to engage him in these very significant decisions. He humors me and acts like he cares (for a few minutes at least), simply choosing the cheapest and trying to convince me that they are the best. I come home needing either a caffeinated coffee or a nap…but hopefully with some shoes in tow…or “toe.”

So, today was the day. Shoe shopping. Ugh. Mark took a day off to study and work on some messages he’s giving over Labor Day weekend. Perfect opportunity (if there is such a thing) to head out shopping sans Lydia while she napped.

Having snagged a pair of silver Geox sneakers last week at about 60% off (sweet!) for Ashlyn which she loves, I was already ahead of the game. One pair down and one kid less put me at an advantage. Mr. Easy-to-Please Drew found 4 pairs right away that he wanted to try on. His favorites were not my favorites – a little bit more shiny silver than I was hoping for. But, my coaching towards the more dull pair still left him feeling like they were, well, dull. Fine. Whatever. I’m letting him get the ones he wants. The price was fine. And, the style name is “Pre Galaxy 4” which got a high pitched “AWESOME” out of Drew. That’s two pairs down.

Now, Evan. With now a size 3.5 shoe, I did not realize that we had an added handicap this year. He wanted shoes with aliens, futuristic shoes, something that glowed, something that lit up, and definitely no laces to tie. Not. Happening. We looked. We tried on. Everything he liked stopped at a 3. Everything I suggested got a blank stare from him. Finally, a pair that he thinks looks futuristic enough, and I think is actually quite nice. They don’t have 3.5, but they can get it. But, when they go to order it, they are completely out of stock as are all their stores in the whole stinkin’ country. Back to the shoe display with a very frustrated 9 year old complaining that this is taking too long and two other kids who are now tunneling under chairs and pretending shoe horns are guns. I’m now sweating. I convince Evan to try on a couple more pairs but he doesn’t like them or they are too tight or “they rub me wrong right here.” One more pair to try on. And, they are obnoxious a bit bold for my taste. And, he likes them. He is prancing around in them saying, “Yeah, I like these. These are good. They look futuristic. They look like fire. And, the bottoms are so cool.” And, of course, they are the most expensive sneakers there. And, I said, “Great! They are super cool. I love them, and Daddy is going to totally love them!” And, I bought them. So, Evan is now the proud new wearer of these shoes named Speed that he has renamed Galaxy 9.